Wednesday, June 23, 2010


First off, Its titled 'Re-Ethel' its not like it happened again, more like an imaginary do-over. And if you haven't read my blogpost "Ethel" please go read it first.

It has been brought to my attention that the other night, whilst saving an old lady, I should've gotten Will's number. If for no other reason than to let him know that good ol Ethel was ok. This having been brought to my attention got me thinking- about how that night COULD have gone. I guess I was too focused on the major issue to actually consider the details... In other words, my heroic, lifesaving impulse trumped my sex drive. Which is obviously wrong. If television has taught me anything, its that those two impulses should work in tandum. Near-death-experience-makeouts are the shiz. And, i feel, this category extends to saving others lives...

Back to the details. Looking back, I remember details, that if actually taken into account then, might have entire changed the outcome of that night... Thus I give to you, the details of the night. Things I noticed, and what should've happened that night...

As I was pulling up the street, I saw Will walk into his house, im pretty sure he saw the old lady. He didn't come back out of the house until I had helped Ethel to the sidewalk. This was sometime later, after he saw me helping her. The conclusion I draw from this- He wants me.

He shows real concern for the lady, but keeps looking at me. Oh yeah. Definitely wants me.

I go to get a jacket out of my car, he takes the lady by the arm, offers his shoes to her. He was trying to impress me with his sensitive caring attitude.

Mistake I made? I called my Mom. Never call your Mom when you have a man. Mom=mood killer.

He says we should get her somewhere warm, he suggests that maybe she just needs to sit down for a while, he glances back at his house. You sly dog, did you just nonchalantly invite me back to your place? Clever.

At this point, the cops would show up(cops make every situation more sexy... unless you are getting a ticket), my mom wouldn't be there, we'd find Ethel's home, and all of a sudden we would be relieved that Ethel is safe and sound.

Enter near-death-experience-makeout. He was cute in kind of a punk-skater sort of way. And we all know how I kiss people I just met. So, this would've worked out perfectly. Mm.

Too bad my good impulses override my bad ones.


  1. PS. Becky gets some credit for this post.

  2. Bahahhahah... You could take him baked goods to thank him for his help? Enter his home with a pretense of gratefulness? Deal.